i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
did i walk over a car last night?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
