I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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