even my farts smell like vagina
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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