Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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