Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
