She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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