Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
