its not stalking. its research.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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