So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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