When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
