I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
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