My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
The feeling are messing with the penis
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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