Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
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With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
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In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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