He is such a slut. More and more my type.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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