My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
