so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
