i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize