trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
