just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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