U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Randomize
