After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
