what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
