Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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