As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
did you just send me my own nude
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize