What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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