i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
