Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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