She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
