He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
