in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
