i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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