Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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