i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
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