oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
