Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
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