Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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