Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize