we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
