idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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