Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
