Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
