i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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