I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize