I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
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