It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
A+ Viking dick
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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