just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize