hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
