halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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