Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
soo... how was my night?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
