Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
