how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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